New YOrk STate

While You Were Away Part IV

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I got on my knees as I was accustomed to doing. I loved being in the submissive position whenever I pleasured him. I admired his cock as an artist does his muse. He was my piece of art and with each stroke I made magic. I took my time, pulling back the skin as he was uncircumcised. I began licking him allowing my taste buds to build with excitement. I began kissing it slowly, building up the intensity, never giving him the same routine. Each time was a new experience. The head received slow and steady kisses. The shaft was territory for my tongue to lick and saturate with my saliva. I felt my nipples getting stiffer by the second. I noticed my legs sticking together, clearly my clit was throbbing with secretion of pure wetness.

He grew more fuller in my tight mouth. Soon enough the five inches grew to 8.5 inches. I slowly opened my eyes and met his gaze. He thoroughly enjoyed watching me as I took all of him in my mouth. I kept my eyes connected to his as he grasped the back of my head and forced my mouth deeper into his fullness. I gaged and shifted in and out of being able to breathe. Tears streamed down my face but I wanted to make sure he released in my mouth and I was never comfortable with wasting a drop. He tilted his head back and then it happened, as it always did, he belted out a moan that was synchronized with body jerks and leg tremors. I’m sure the neighbors heard but we could care less. I got off my knees and swallowed it in one gulp. He grabbed my waist and pulled me close, to the point our pelvic bones connected. He kissed me as if he needed my lips to survive. Within seconds, I was hoisted in the air and raised to his shoulders. My lower lips were being feasted on again, with the cream from the last session coating his face. I shook violently as my body reminded me how much I needed this orgasm.

He flipped me over into doggie style and wasted no time to give me what I longed for. We made sweet music with our bodies, never coming up for air, nor breaking the rhythmic grinding and stroking movements. An hour had passed before he couldn’t deprive himself any longer from releasing what he held for too long. I begged him to feed me his protein and he obliged. Something about him watching me receive his nut makes me feel content. Once we were done, I recall him kissing my forehead and then I watched him as he walked into the restroom. Moments later the warm rag caressed my sensitive lips and then he blew gently on my privates to dry the wet spots. He pulled the heated blanket over my chilled body and turned the lights.

Hours had pass before my phone stirred me from my slumber. Initially I thought I was dreaming of my phone ringing but the noise wouldn’t break. I slowly opened my eyes and saw my phone in a distance vibrating. I didn’t realize how long I was knocked out. The blinds were closed and room dark. I stretched my hand over to the nightstand and touched in search of my phone. I wanted to answer the phone before it woke Blake, as I assumed he was fast asleep next to me. Little did I know he was already up.

My fingers felt the edge of the sleek of my phone but before I could grasp it, it was snatched from my fingertips.

 

Blake: Hello!

Shawn: My bad, this must be the wrong number.

Blake: Who are you looking for?!

Shawn: Nah B…I’m sure this is the wrong number.

Blake: Are you sure?

Shawn: Yes, you’re not my fiancée…matter of fact…have a good day.

Blake: You looking for Jen?!

Shawn: YOoooO…Son! Why you answering my girl phone? Who dis?!

Blake: (Silence) your girl?

Blake threw the phone at me, barely missing my face. I picked up the phone and feared what I would hear on the other end. When I spoke, I heard heavy breathing. In the next breath, he spoke venomous words. Words that were and still too painful to repeat. My heart betrayed me and suddenly I felt the tears escape my eyelids. I felt cold but my tears were warm, as if a volcano had erupted within me. I hung up the phone in the middle of his tirade about how much of a trifling bitch I was. He made threats of calling my mother and telling her how I cheated on him. He screamed, “I can’t believe I loved you. You nasty bitch! The wedding is off. I hate you…I hate you Jen!” When I rolled onto my side to console myself, the door flew open. I almost forgot I wasn’t home.

He stood there with rage in his eyes. I sat up in the bed and turned on the lamp. We locked eyes for a moment. I watched his chest heave high and low as though he were gasping for air to fill his lungs. When he spoke, the pain stifled his words. I couldn’t bear to hear him say those words. I interrupted him mid-sentence and said whatever it would take to make him stop speaking. “Baby, he means nothing to me. I promise you, it’s over. I came here because this is where I want to be. I choose you. He’s mad and said I was his girl in order to hurt you. Believe me. I love you Blake!”

When he walked over to the bed, I was still nervous because I was unsure if he would hit or hug me. He knelt next to me and I touched the top of his head. He laid on my right thigh and then the unexpected happen. I felt wetness fill my lap, to the point I thought I was still wet from earlier. I cupped his chin with my right hand and turned his face towards me. He pulled his face away and quickly jumped up and left the room. I followed him in haste to the study.

I waited a few minutes by the door, totally unsure of what to do next. What’s wrong my love? “Jen, I think its best we break things off. You will never be ready for what I’m ready to offer. I’m not every going to be the other guy. It’s clear you have some unfinished business. I won’t be number #2. Just leave me alone!” I’m not sure if I was still feeling defeated from the phone call or was it the thought of losing the both of them. I ran over to him and threw my arms around him. I reminded him that I loved him and needed him to not give up on our love. Honestly, I didn’t think he’d fall for my act but he did.

We decided to make plans to go to Suya Spot a Nigerian restaurant in Baltimore County for dinner. I told him I would meet him there but needed to get home to shower and change my clothes. He decided he wanted to be with me and was not going to let me go home alone. I didn’t protest, so we took my car back to my place. On the ride home, he was very silent; uncomfortably silent. He spent majority of the trip staring out the window. I pulled into my driveway and noticed my kitchen light was on. I didn’t pay much attention to it as I figured I may have left it on the night prior. I asked Blake to retrieve my bag out of the trunk. He slammed the trunk shut and I gave him the ‘Imma slap the shit out of you stare.’ I hate how he slams everything. Geesh

I decided to pick my battles and just keep my trap shut. When we got to the top of the steps, I went to disarm the house but noticed the alarm was already off. At this time, I told Blake, someone is inside my home. He quickly ran back down to my car and yelled for me to unlock the doors. He got his 9-millimeter from under the passenger seat and ran back up the steps. When I opened the front door, Blake walked in front of me. When I began to survey the living room, I noticed Shawn’s suitcase in the middle of the living room floor. As we began to walk towards the staircase, I heard someone coming down the steps. Whomever it was didn’t’ realize we were in the house as they appeared nonchalant. Blake stood in front of me and as they locked eyes, it happened. Blake ran towards Shawn with his gun drawn. I went to leap towards Blake to grab the hem of his shirt but it was too late. All I saw was Shawn fall to the grown. I screamed, “Noooo!!!!” Blake Shot again, then he…

 

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Knowing Your Worth- Part III “New Beginnings”

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I am beginning to think that this was all too much for me to take on. He has refused to take the paternity test, as he believes that I could have been with anyone. The nerve of this man! After he knew he was my everything. I thought I knew Philip, the man whom was my lover, best friend, and now the father to my child. I refuse to be a single parent without the support of the father. Tiffany told me that I should leave it alone and move on. But how can I move on when my heart believes that he still loves me. Am I crazy? Was it all a lie? Did he really only view me as a side chick?

All of my friends told me that I should have abort my child. I honestly could not bring myself to do it, my child is a part of me. I fall asleep every night with my hand on my tummy, placed exactly where I can feel the heart beat. It is so tranquil, it makes me so proud to know that within me is a part of Philip and I growing in unison. Does that make me a fool for going forward with this pregnancy? I beg to differ. We were a unit; it will be well between us. After having two early labor scares, I mustered up the courage to call him again. It was the night of Valentines day, he sent my calls to voicemail twice. I dialed him once more and he picked up, sounding like he had smoke coming out of his ear. “What the hell do you want, you stupid idiot?!” Hello Philip, I understand your anger but we need to talk. I would like to speak with you tomorrow after you get out of the office. I know you frequent Buka on Fulton Street in Brooklyn on Wednesday’s to watch soccer. I must meet with you in person, this is very important. “Sheila, I have no interest in meeting you and even if I entertained that idea, I have plans tomorrow.” I would only require an hour of your time. “What time are you talking about? You know that I am a very busy man! Also, how do you know that I frequent Buka on Wednesdays?” Philip, that part is not important, can you meet me at 6 pm? “Ok.”

I arrived a little early, so I could calm my nerves and park in my usual spot. It’s been months since I’ve seen him. Who am I kidding, I mean, it’s been months since we have talked face to face. I see him each week, though he does not see me. I wait in my car and watch him go in and out of Buka. I don’t see anything wrong with watching him, it is not weird, though Tiffany begs to differ. I have even studied his schedule, to a science. He usually arrives at about 5:30 pm but he waits in his car until 6 pm. Once the parking meter rules are suspended at 6 pm, he heads into the restaurant. His dinner normally consists of, Jollof rice, chicken stew, sweet plantains, and a glass of Red Stripe. He has always loved Red Stripe, ever since we went to Jamaica on our one-year anniversary. I am so thankful for the bartender Pete that likes me, he always gives me the scoop. He is a nice guy but I am not attracted to Pete, I just use him for his information. Besides, what do I look like dating someone and I am a week away from giving birth. In any event, I reward him for his information by allowing him to give me foot rubs. He has a foot fetish, so I allow him to rub my feet on Saturdays as he fills me in on all that is going on with Philip.

Pete told me that Philip and his wife have been going through a lot. He said the wife has gone back to Nigeria and refuses to come back until he cleans up his act. Apparently, Philip has sowed his seeds with another woman by the name of Adeola. Adeola, is the woman that I saw in the car with him, the night I told him I was pregnant. She is one of the Senior Vice Presidents at his firm. In addition, it turns out that she is seven months pregnant. She decided to keep it, as per Pete, because Philip said he intends to leave his wife for her. I heard she looks miserable, and they normally end the night in a screaming match. I am furious that he impregnated another woman but who am I to judge.

Philip walked into the restaurant as if he had his own theme music playing in the background. He is so cocky but it is so sexy to me. He walked up to me and smirked, though I wanted a kiss, I was elated to see him. As soon as he sat down, a whiff of his fragrance hit me like a ton of bricks. Immediately, I inhaled Chanel Bleu and wanted his scent all over me. I gathered my thoughts and said, I want you there next week when I give birth, how do you feel about that? Surprisingly, he obliged and the following week, he was by my side as we welcomed our beautiful daughter Abeo Eva Adeoye on February 22nd. He stayed with me every night, though I knew he was uncomfortable, sleeping in that awkward hospital chair, but he never complained.

Abeo has her father’s eyes and lips. She has a beautiful spirit, she does not cry much and loves smiling. Indeed, she has become my version of heaven on earth. I find that I stare at her as she sleeps, as if I fear this is a dream and I could wake from it. Her father has been with her every single day. The only drawback is crazy behind Adeola. She has come by my home twice already and have keyed my Benz and given me two flat tires. Philip said she has a brother that works at the Police Station that can locate his car, via GPS, at any time. Therefore, she has been tormenting me for the past two weeks.

I decided that this night I was going to give her something to remember. I walked out the front door and asked her why she was on my property? Oh how I wish I never went outside. Let’s just say, I asked Philip to leave that night and decided to raise my child without his help. There was a reason why Philip didn’t want me to go outside. Apparently, Adeola is the sister to his wife, yes, his sister in law and they have been having an affair for the past two years. Wait, there is more, she is HIV Positive. She went on to explain that Philip is the man she contracted the disease from. The reason why she has been coming by is because her medical insurance does not fully cover her HIV meds. Philip is suppose to pay for half and he has not been answering her calls and she has grown desperate. That’s the reason why she turned to her brother (the cop) for assistance. As I stood there, I felt as if someone shot me in the heart. I felt a sense of relief for myself, but a tremendous sense of sadness for this woman who Philip has just ruined her life.

Thankfully, he did not give me the disease, as we ALWAYS used protection. I was so grateful that me and my child dodged a bullet. Here I was, lusting after a married man, who was HIV positive. It makes no sense but honestly, if I had not gone outside that night, I could have potentially become his next victim. It has been two years since I’ve seen or heard from Philip. I heard from Pete that he has lost a substantial amount of weight. Sadly, Adeola passed during child birth and her child died the day immediately following. When Pete told me the story, I could not help but cry. Both were victims to a heartless coward, who cared little about either of their lives. I am thankful that I had the courage to move on and allow myself to love again. I am engaged to a wonderful man who loves me as much as he loves my daughter, whom he has adopted. I learned so much from my relationship with Philip. There comes a time when you have to ask yourself, if you are running after this man, then who is running after you? I grew to know my worth and will not be second best to anyone, ever again.